Serious equal to lose?

  I'm so wondering... Is it after we get serious in something, then it mean we sure lose? Serious is a bad thing? Base on common sense, serious is a good attitude... I feel my serious was too over already... My serious may hurt people... I also don't like my own serious... But when I'm not serious, people around me say I'm to annoying... Once I be serious, people around me say they hate my serious face pula... Many friends told me I shouldn't live at the way how people looked at me... I tried to live my for my own, but seem that I had failed... In the end, I still live for how people look at me... I wanna learn how to control serious because I very tired to getting hurt some more... I very fed up with myself... Why I so weak? Why I so easy to care so much? Why I so easy beat by people comments? I just wanna be the real me... I treat people nice but people won't treat me nice back... I know I treat people nice doesn't mean people should treat me nice back but at least don't hurt me or treat me cold, right? I'm wondering..... Should I serious? Should I be nice guy? Or should I be bad guy? Bad guy hard to get hurt? Is it true? But I don't want hurt people also don't want people hurt me....